My neck hurts because of a whiplash injury, this also causes severe migraine way too often in my opinion. But there's not much to do about it and the injury can't get any worse so I just have to live with it. Try to refrain from doing things that increases the pain.
My back hurts. The backbone, the symbol of stability in various contexts, is in my case not stable. There are three points where the vertebrae can move a little bit too much causing extreme pain. One area can be so painful at times I have difficulties breathing. Another area further down in my back makes it difficult for me to be standing and/or walking for any longer period of time. I hurts so much I can pass out if I don't sit down.
However...
That's all nothing to the pain I have in my heart.
Physical pain even real bad nerve pain is so much easier to handle than the pain you feel when your heart is breaking. Yes, you want the physical pain to go away, it also makes you cry, it can be so bad you just want to die.
But...
How useless you ever might feel because of your physical pain you know it's not your fault, you didn't do anything wrong. It's just your body that's damaged by some accident you couldn't do anything about.
When your heart beaks it's a different story altogether. No matter how low your own opinion is about yourself it always hurts and you always wonder why they leave you. Why they don't love you, though that might be a stretch. Because obviously there is something wrong with the pathetic being you are, obviously you aren't good enough, obviously you did something wrong.
And you swear never to trust anyone ever again. Never to let anyone come that close again. You don't ever want to love again, because you know they will leave too.
And you know that even if someone would come along saying all the right things, doing all the right things....
It might make you feel good, but you will also feel very sad. Because deep down inside your heart that terrible pain will never ever stop. It will never ever go away. You will never ever be that same trusting person again who took love for granted, who trusted those sweet words.
That trust is gone.
The pain is there.
The scars are there.
The scars in your heart, in your soul - they don't heal.
Thursday, February 5, 2015
Monday, January 5, 2015
Reality, daydream, fantasy or RP
Reality
The myth of the cave:
In this allegory, people are chained from birth in a cave where they see nothing but shadows created by others. Plato asks us to imagine how those who are chained can learn about and come to accept true reality. This story illustrates Plato’s theory of knowledge, truth and education.
People chained in the cave = Those who, knowing no better and having no opportunity to know better, accept phenomenon as reality. What they perceive, they interpret as real.
Plato (430-347 B.C.)
Daydream
Freudian psychology
interpret daydreaming as expression of the repressed instincts similarly to those revealing themselves in nighttime dreams. Like nighttime dreams, daydreams also are an example of wish-fulfillment, based on infantile experiences and allowed to surface because of relaxed censorship. He pointed out that in contrast to nighttime dreams, which are often confusing and incoherent, there seems to be a process of "secondary revision" in fantasies that makes them more lucid, like daydreaming. The state of daydreaming is a kind of liminal state between waking (with the ability to think rationally and logically) and sleeping.
Freud (1856-1939)
Fantasy
Traits of fantasy
The identifying traits of fantasy are the inclusion of fantastic elements in a self-coherent (internally consistent) setting, where inspiration from mythology and folklore remains a consistent theme. Within such a structure, any location of the fantastical element is possible: it may be hidden in, or leak into the apparently real world setting, it may draw the characters into a world with such elements, or it may occur entirely in a fantasy world setting, where such elements are part of the world. Essentially, fantasy follows rules of it's own making, allowing magic and other fantastic devices to be used and still be internally cohesive.
Wikipedia
RP
Two or more people writing a story together
RP stands for Role Play. It's a type of writing which usually happens between two or more people. and it is notoriously hard to finish a single story before starting a new one. Each person takes on one central character as their character, and then accepts responsibilities for several or many others depending on how many people are participating in the RP. However, the more people,the harder it is to keep organized and controlled.Traditionally beat and easiest between two writers. One person starts, the other replies, the first reply to the reply etc. Often taken on in the writing community between two people who are close friends, or else is used as a way fir writers to get used to another person'e style. When two people participating in the RP know one-another very well, it's often possible to distinguish what their reply to a certain situation will be, and can therefore be anticipated a d detailed before it even happens.
Urban Dictionary
The myth of the cave:
In this allegory, people are chained from birth in a cave where they see nothing but shadows created by others. Plato asks us to imagine how those who are chained can learn about and come to accept true reality. This story illustrates Plato’s theory of knowledge, truth and education.
People chained in the cave = Those who, knowing no better and having no opportunity to know better, accept phenomenon as reality. What they perceive, they interpret as real.
Plato (430-347 B.C.)
Daydream
Freudian psychology
interpret daydreaming as expression of the repressed instincts similarly to those revealing themselves in nighttime dreams. Like nighttime dreams, daydreams also are an example of wish-fulfillment, based on infantile experiences and allowed to surface because of relaxed censorship. He pointed out that in contrast to nighttime dreams, which are often confusing and incoherent, there seems to be a process of "secondary revision" in fantasies that makes them more lucid, like daydreaming. The state of daydreaming is a kind of liminal state between waking (with the ability to think rationally and logically) and sleeping.
Freud (1856-1939)
Fantasy
Traits of fantasy
The identifying traits of fantasy are the inclusion of fantastic elements in a self-coherent (internally consistent) setting, where inspiration from mythology and folklore remains a consistent theme. Within such a structure, any location of the fantastical element is possible: it may be hidden in, or leak into the apparently real world setting, it may draw the characters into a world with such elements, or it may occur entirely in a fantasy world setting, where such elements are part of the world. Essentially, fantasy follows rules of it's own making, allowing magic and other fantastic devices to be used and still be internally cohesive.
Wikipedia
RP
Two or more people writing a story together
RP stands for Role Play. It's a type of writing which usually happens between two or more people. and it is notoriously hard to finish a single story before starting a new one. Each person takes on one central character as their character, and then accepts responsibilities for several or many others depending on how many people are participating in the RP. However, the more people,the harder it is to keep organized and controlled.Traditionally beat and easiest between two writers. One person starts, the other replies, the first reply to the reply etc. Often taken on in the writing community between two people who are close friends, or else is used as a way fir writers to get used to another person'e style. When two people participating in the RP know one-another very well, it's often possible to distinguish what their reply to a certain situation will be, and can therefore be anticipated a d detailed before it even happens.
Urban Dictionary
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